Figuring out what you're supposed to do and what you want to do can get pretty confusing. For so long in my life I've felt like I'm right on the brink of something, but when you stand at the top of a cliff for so long, you just begin to enjoy the view instead of getting caught up on the anxiety of standing so close to the edge. Does life follow a trend or do you develop cycles for change? After your current cycle ends, do you feel the need to cultivate your life and turn everything up? Or do we find comfort in what we know, knowing that we're building on top of the cycles that have come before the current?

I put a lot of hope into Time, that it heals, that it clarifies and that it gives you a new perspective. The agony is in the waiting. One of my friends suggested to me recently that "you can leave and come back, but you can't stay and go" - so does that mean that you always need to go for the new experience? There's definitely a sense of adventure in that statement, but it doesn't absolve the reality of now. You can leave and come back, but not in this current state, so is your relative present play a bigger role or is just another part of the puzzle?

I'm not sure that I live my life for happiness, I think I've lived it so far mostly for goodness, to do what's right. But "rightness" is relative still, so should this life we all live be so self-centered? I think other people need to be considered otherwise you're a complete narcissist. What's right for me isn't necessarily right for the whole. It creates a disconnect for me, this world is a shared resource and part of what it means to be human is to rub elbows with each other...as annoying as it is. Yet, parents in the US all raise their children to be happy, many Asian cultures raise their children to be successful, I think I want to grow up being balanced...but that sounds so conservative. I'm not sure what the answer is, but it seems like a cycle is ending and something needs to change, it's just a matter of finding out what that is. I guess time will tell.